Potato Famine

This is what an encyclopaedia entry for "Potato Famine", as written by me, would look like. You're welcome, brutha.

Potato Famine: A revolt which claimed an estimated fifteen lives in the first half of the first month of the year 1840. Unsatisfied with their lot in life, the potatoes of Ireland unearthed themselves the night before harvest time. The possibility of starvation loomed large in the populace's mind for the whole of one day. A march was organized by the potatoes, with the intention of forcing the Irish to realize how much their livelihood depended on the potatoes. In the ensuing craziness, a large percentage of the people exchanged the majority of their material goods (what little they had) in exchange for money. A quickly organized slave trade ensured that, for those who could afford them, potatoes could still be had. The treatment of these potatoes was often brutal. Whipping, or mashing, the potatoes was common, after which they poured hot butter and salt on the potatoes, the butter as a symbol of the potatoes' "greasy" or "slippery" treachery, and the salt symbolizing the salty language the potatoes would use to taunt the weak, not-really starving Irish. Finally, the tensions came to a head when the potatoes were defeated by the Irish in the famous battle of Au Gratin. The potatoes, called "taters" by their Irish captors, were sent to Malcolm French, a famous executioner. French sliced the "taters" to bits, then threw the bits into hot oil. A headline of the time were supposed to read "FRENCH FRIES REBEL POTATOES", but the print size was too large, and the headline of several copies (before being corrected due to the unfortunate and unintended meaning) read only: "FRENCH FRIES".